I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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