D3 body, D1 cock
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
