so that wasnt chicken after all
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Its about making memories worth repressing
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
