I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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