i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize