oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
