I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
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