I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
