He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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