So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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