u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
