He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize