then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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