Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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