i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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