My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Randomize
