a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
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