Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize