Walk of Shame. In a state park.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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