I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize