just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
