It's Friday. Sex?
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
