Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
