butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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