i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
