Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
