I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize