How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
