You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
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