he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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