I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Someone shattered a urinal.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
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