so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
