Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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