There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize