Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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