Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
foreskin is a definite game changer
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Sex in the backyard? Check.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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