Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Semen is not good for contacts.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
