You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
