he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Randomize
