I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
