i jhust puked up my retainher.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
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