i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
