White coat. Heels.
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I got inside last night via doggy door
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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