it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize