I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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