Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
