I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
we're making bets on your personal life
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
