My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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