i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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