I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
