Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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